Greetings cards ideas…

I think I’ve spotted a gap in the market. With the scope of things we can now celebrate and sympathise over, I wonder why we haven’t seen a much fuller range. My ideas follow…

CONGRATULATIONS!

You’ve wreaked revenge on your sister/ex-best friend/ex-spouse

IN DEEPEST SYMPATHY

You’ve lost your common sense. Why else would you buy a Skoda on credit?

CONGRATULATIONS… YOU IDIOT

You’ve emigrated and left your friends, job, house and children for a life in a strange country with foreign currency, food you know you don’t even like and neighbours who all own guns

WE’LL MISS YOU…

For a month or so…

We’re celebrating

You’re finally leaving.

 

CONGRATULATIONS!

You’ve wreaked revenge on your sister/ex-best friend/ex-spouse

CONGRATULATIONS… YOU IDIOT

You’ve emigrated and left your friends, job, house and children for a life in a strange country with foreign currency, food you know you don’t even like and neighbours who all own guns

WE’LL MISS YOU…

For a month or so…

WE’RE CELEBRATING!

You’re finally leaving.

IN DEEPEST SYMPATHY

You still haven’t managed to conceive this year.

ON YOUR GOLDEN WEDDING ANNIVERSARY

Quite good going for a gunshot wedding…

ON YOUR GRADUATION

It’s going to be tough. Third rate grad with a degree in the films of Scooby Doo and a cocky belief that you’ll walk straight into role of right hand man to Steven Spielberg… Good luck

GOOD LUCK

As a third rate grad…

TO MY NEW SISTER/BROTHER

I’ll be nice when Mummy’s not looking to shove your head in the garden fence, steal your pocket money and humiliate you whenever possible

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY

Twenty five years filling me with paranoia, insecurity and doubt, it’s your turn. The first of twenty five cards telling you how much you are to blame for my depression, lack of girlfriend and inability to manage my life. Cheers

Just a thought…

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